The Unseen Side of Church Leadership: Myths, Media, and the Pursuit of Truth
A veteran leader's perspective on the misconceptions and media narratives surrounding megachurch pastors.
~ around 915 words - but this is just part 1 - 3 minute read
With a career spanning over 40 years, I have worked with senior pastors of large churches. Reflecting on the participant lists from that season of Senior Pastor Forums, Lifestage Communities, and Leadership Communities at Leadership Network, along with the countless consulting clients and conversations, I can confidently estimate that I have interacted with over 5,000 different individuals—and that is just the Senior Pastors.
My journey began with a corps of pre-Boomer pastors. I then witnessed the rise of the boomer church and pastor. Joining Leadership Network during the emergence of the Gen X pastor and church, I am now working with a diverse mix of Boomer, GenX, and later-era pastors and churches. This diverse experience has provided me with a comprehensive understanding of the dynamics of large church leadership, enlightening me and, in turn, my audience.
Some are now with Jesus or retired. Some are no longer pastoring by their own choice. Some stepped down due to other circumstances.
Recently, a reporter’s call brought to light a common misunderstanding that I have often addressed during my time at Leadership Network, and now as an independent consultant. I try to provide an outsider's perspective on large church leaders to reporters with little clue. This commitment to clarity and accuracy, a cornerstone of my work, ensures that my information is reliable and trustworthy.
The question was: “Don’t megachurch pastors have a higher rate of affairs?”
My answer is not scientific but based on my large sample set and comparison. I will get to that answer later.
Scott Thumma and I collaborated on a book nearly two decades ago: Beyond Megachurch Myths. This book, which remains my bestseller and is cited regularly by scholars, is a testament to our rigorous research. It addresses some of the prevalent myths and misconceptions. Our work was not just based on observation but also comprehensive research and surveys conducted with large churches and megachurch attenders.
Some of my answers below reflect that research core, but admittedly, some are observational.
Let’s call these Facts and Fallacies.
First, in all of the statements below, I am describing what I saw or saw in 90-95% of the Senior/Lead pastors I have observed, not all. There are always a few exceptions.
Second, most commentators cite the exceptions, not the general population of these pastors. The flaming exceptions are always the story in the news. “If it bleeds, it leads.”
The true story is much less dramatic and healthier.
Here we go with the first ones. I will state the fallacy in the extreme sense, but I have seen someone state it in a news article, blog post, Facebook post, or similar public forum in most cases.
FALLACY: Most of these pastors have affairs.
Fact:
Most don’t. There are a few flameouts, but most have never had that behavior.
It makes news when it happens of course. I get that.
But don’t paint with a broad brush. Most have faithful and long marriages.
In my work in the Senior Pastor Smart Succession Process ™, to my knowledge, none have ever been in this situation. My sample size is extensive there.
Geoff Surratt just wrote a great post on these issues as a counterpoint, though, and I commend it highly here.
(What Chat GPT thinks the call on the carpet meeting looks like)
I know there have been some highly publicized and prominent stories recently. Those saddened me for all concerned, especially for the kingdom's cause and congregations.
This is not to excuse anyone in this regard. And for those charged with sexual crimes, it is horrific beyond belief.
REPORTER QUIRK: A pastor is anyone who works at a church or sometimes volunteers there. This is a common misunderstanding.
Therefore, if one is accused of an affair, or worse, a sexual crime, the story becomes: “Pastor accused of________.”
Sometimes, that is caused by churches being unclear in their own titles, but it is primarily a reporter misunderstanding or an editor trying to gain clicks.
In that light, though, because larger churches do have scores of staff members and hundreds of volunteers, there could be a higher number of reported affairs and sex crimes among larger churches when compared to other sizes.
I attribute that to several factors:
See the rest after the advert……don’t worry it’s short
A special THURSDAY – 30 minute Teaching on Succession
The DIY Assumptions that will lead to Succession Failure
Some of you are great experimenters and want to do it yourself.
Let me explain some assumptions that some make during the process, which tend to cause most of the issues with do-it-yourselfers in this context.
THURSDAY August, 15 – NOON ET, 11 CT, and so on.
Story continues……
1. The law of large numbers. With more pastors, there is a greater chance of this happening.
2. Some large churches have established better procedures for identifying and reporting these issues to proper authorities. Not as many as should, but it is much better in larger churches than in small churches.
3. Many of these concerns are either “hushed up” or dismissed quietly with no press attention in small churches. Few care what happens in smaller churches.
(Some of those come to light later in a leader’s career at another church after the smaller church fails to mention it or correct)
I don’t want to leave this section on a downer.
Over 40 years of working with a cross-section of churches from different tribes and traditions, I have seen a sea change in how churches and denominations have handled these accusations, criminal acts, and, in some cases, restoration.
It is getting better. We are in that odd space where one would look back at previous decisions and actions of boards, bishops, and those in authority and judge them by today’s standards and understanding.
I am not saying that should not happen. It is a needed part of the correction and renewal process.
However, what was once the conventional wisdom in some places about how these issues should be handled is now totally different. One would shudder to read past denominational policies and records on how the offenders and victims were treated.
Similarly, law enforcement, prosecutors, and the health community have changed their perspectives and vigilance on these issues. That is also for the better.
Now, we also have better help and support for victims, not just through legal systems and courts but also churches and other groups.
It’s not there yet, but I am hopeful.
In my view, most churches are well ahead of other Christian nonprofits, schools, universities, and some businesses in these areas.
In my next issue, which will be out in a few weeks, I will address the “Structural argument” that some believe contributes to this problem and a few other fallacies that come my way several times a year.
Don’t forget this valuable resource from Generis - The Next Sunday Podcast.
Jim Sheppard and Frank Bealer.